Share on PinterestChoosing a restaurant that you know and love can help make dinner less stressful if you have diabetes. Tom Werner / Getty Images
The phrase “it’s complicated” doesn’t even describe the wild world of dating.
And when you consider treating a chronic condition while managing your love life, dating someone can be a bit daunting to say the least.
We can’t talk about whether your date always chews with their mouths closed, is a good conversationalist, or makes your heart beat faster.
But if you have type 2 diabetes, you may be wondering how the disease affects your love life. The good news: It doesn’t have to mess up dating yet.
We’ve put together a guide for dating with type 2 diabetes. That way, you can focus on the fun parts of getting to know someone better – like the hoped-for fluttering hearts.
The fact that you are an avid swimmer or have a Labradoodle is a no-brainer to add on your dating app profile. Your pooch is likely in the front and center of your profile picture anyway.
But what about type 2 diabetes? Should you include that as an attribute?
Some experts say you probably shouldn’t post your diagnosis on your dating profile – but not because it’s something to hide.
“Given that online dating profiles are public and can be seen by people who are you and are not interested in dating, online data shouldn’t post essential health information on their profiles, but rather wait for the appropriate context and the right time has been found to discuss their health status, ”says Dr. Jess Carbino, former sociologist for the dating apps Tinder and Bumble.
If you’re adding your type 2 diabetes diagnosis to your dating profile, you may want to check the box for complete transparency, adds Jason Lee, a relationship scientist and data analyst at Healthy Framework.
“It’s starting to let your health define who you are, however, and dwarf the other things that you do about you,” he says.
“You are not your diagnosis – your diagnosis is part of your story.” – Marissa Tunis, PsyD
Dr. Marissa Tunis, a licensed psychologist, dating coach, relationship expert, and founder of Datefully, agrees, “Health conditions are best shared after you’ve connected to someone through an app, not on your profile.”
“You are not your diagnosis – your diagnosis is part of your story,” she says.
Share on PinterestRemember: your potential partner is not with your diabetes, but with you. People Images / Getty Images
There is no single answer to when to tell a potential partner that you have type 2 diabetes. However, experts recommend having the conversation when it feels natural.
“There’s no set time frame or dating milestone by which to reveal your condition,” says Michele Benoit, Life Coach at Deep Blue Coach. “But the general rule of thumb would be to share the news with your dating partner when it becomes relevant – because of an action or decision that affects both of you – or when you are comfortable enough to learn more intimate, daily details about yourself and to share how you live. “
Tips to Talk About Your Diabetes
- Call it up at the beginning of your conversation.
- Be open and honest about how diabetes affects you.
- Keep the conversation open and short.
- Give the other person time to ask questions.
When you’re ready to talk about your diabetes, it may be useful to bring up the condition at the beginning of a conversation or your time together.
“The [way] The previous discussion does not unduly affect what you want to say and does not make you hesitate or do so at all, ”explains Carbino.
She says to be open and honest about how type 2 diabetes affects your life – but you can do this generally instead of going into too much detail first.
Carbino also recommends making the conversation more of a dialogue and allowing your date to ask questions, if any.
The first time you mention Type 2 Diabetes to a new date or partner, they may ask questions that seem silly or misinformed.
“Remember, they may not know about type 2 diabetes,” says Lee.
If their response is more about a misunderstanding, it’s up to you whether you want to provide more insight.
“A little clarity can turn things around,” says Benoit.
However, this does not mean that you have to endure negative or otherwise inappropriate comments about type 2 diabetes. In this case, it can be a sign to reevaluate whether the relationship is right for you.
“If your date is reacting negatively to your condition, you need to think about how helpful they can be on an ongoing basis,” adds Benoit, who helps her clients with dating challenges. “If you don’t see a future with this person, or if they don’t seem open to you, take care of yourself. Make sure you continue your healthy practices and choices. “
These days there are dating apps and websites that cater to just about any preference or community.
A person with diabetes may sometimes find it more convenient to use a diabetes dating site to explore relationships with other people who have the disease.
Dating sites for people with diabetes
Don’t you want to explain your diabetes to every potential partner? Dating sites and apps for people with diabetes can help you find someone who understands them from the start. Here are some options:
“Meeting someone who is familiar with diabetes can be of great help and comfort,” says Benoit.
But it’s not a prerequisite for connecting well with someone or finding someone significant to have your back.
“No matter what is going on in your life, you want your dating partner to support what is important to you,” added Benoit.
Someone can be your rock – and you can be her – even if you are not in the same state of health.
Share on PinterestAs you prepare for your date, be sure to take a diabetes care kit with you on the go. Westend61 / Getty Images
Going on a date can be exciting, but it can also make butterflies rustle your stomach.
From what to wear to what to do, it all feels like a big decision. And when you need to consider factors related to type 2 diabetes, you might have an extra layer of complexity when it comes to dating.
However, you can approach the decisions and dating details in a number of different ways.
Benoit recommends taking action in scheduling the appointment by choosing a restaurant that suits your needs. This can be helpful when you are unwilling to realize that you have type 2 diabetes.
When you’ve practically memorized the carbohydrate numbers in the corner pub, don’t be afraid to suggest your favorite spot. Of course, you can check online menus and find new spots that might work well too.
You might also prefer to choose a no-eating activity and bring your own snacks, adds Benoit. That way, you’ll have something on hand when your blood sugar takes a bath.
Date ideas that aren’t about food
Going to a restaurant can make sticking to your eating plan difficult. Here are some fun alternatives to traditional dinner:
- Stroll through a botanical garden or a nature reserve
- to play minigolf
- go hiking
- Go bowling
- Watch a movie
- Visit a zoo or an aquarium
- Play bingo or board games
- See live music
If you are already open with your potential partner about type 2 diabetes, simply plan meals together until your potential partner gets the hang of it and knows the exercise.
“Be prepared with suggestions for what works for you,” says Benoit. “You may find that your date wants to play it safe and follow your example.”
As your relationship progresses, you may find new ways to show what it’s like to live with diabetes.
“Ready for overnight? Tell them (or show them!) How to measure your blood sugar levels morning and night. Let your partner know what’s going on and how they can support you – even if it just gives you the space you need to take care of yourself, ”says Benoit.
Wherever you are, whatever you are doing, and whether or not you have disclosed your diagnosis, Tunis has this reminder: “It is okay to apologize several times to take care of your health.”
According to Benoit, a small on-the-go care kit can make treating type 2 diabetes a little easier on a date.
Structure of a diabetes care set
Packing a small care kit with you on the go can help you manage your diabetes on a specific date. Here are some tips for creating your kit:
- Invest in a container or bag that you like and that is also easy to carry.
- If you use insulin, go for an isolated option.
- Update the articles regularly so you never miss out on supplies.
- Set up auto-renewal for consumables to prevent leakage.
- Set calendar reminders to charge devices when needed.
If you have type 2 diabetes, your condition doesn’t have to make the dating world any harder. Sure, sometimes it’s all about the food, but you can help find a suitable restaurant or suggest another activity.
With a little planning and a willingness to be open about your diagnosis (when ready), you can have a fulfilling dating experience.
Dating can be complicated for anyone who tries – even people who have never taken a pill or had their blood sugar checked. But dating can also be incredibly fun, especially when you meet someone who just seems to understand you, and vice versa.
Remember, your potential partner is not with your diabetes, but with you.